I am convinced of a truth after living all these years on this earth. Simply and baldly stated, there are some people who have bathed themselves in misery for years. And they truly do not want anyone to hand them a big thick towel to dry off. They experienced a severe trauma in their life some time before, and rather than grieving it, and then slowly moving past it - or at least wanting to move on from it - they get stuck with that wet muck all over them.